Flat Hunt

Seven names. Ring the bell with seven names.

It sounds like a riddle. The riddle of the sphinx. Is this all part of the test? If so, I am missing a trick: there are two bells with seven names.

I ring both.

No answer.

I ring again. Both bells.

No answer. This sphinx is testing my patience.

Third time lucky, I am buzzed into the building.

Up and up. Up and up and up. There’s an open door, and the face of a human. I don’t think it’s attached to the body of a lion. I’m about to ask if I’ve come to the right flat when I hear a shout from further up. Evidently not. I apologise to the human face and continue up the stairs.

There’s another human face and a distinct lack of lion. We shake hands (this is Germany, after all) and he ushers me in.

Bedroom. Bathroom. Kitchen: this is where the other flatmates have congregated. They offer me a glass of water and I sit down. The interview begins. All the basics – what do you do? Where are you from?

They stare at me. ‘You’re from England? Really? And you’re studying Russian and Czech in German?’ They clearly think I’m crazy. Maybe I am. ‘And why did you choose Munich?’ they ask curiously.

‘For the Alps. The skiing.’

A pause. ‘Are you sure you’re from England?!’

I turn the interview around and start quizzing them. In the background I can hear the roar of the road outside, all six lanes of it. I already know my decision: regardless of whether or not I passed the test, this flat did not.

More hours trawling through adverts online, sending messages, receiving very few in return. This is Germany’s most expensive city and it is notoriously difficult to find a flat here. When a landlord puts an advert online, within 10 minutes he has received hundreds of messages.

Somehow, I have to make myself stand out.

But it’s not just about me. It’s also about the flat. I’m not so desperate (yet) that I will go with anything. In the meantime I can stay with friends of friends, and the university semester doesn’t begin for a month.

Of course, the flat doesn’t have to be perfect. A compromise is inevitable. The question is: what am I prepared to compromise on?

Location? I visit a beautiful flat with a garden, a terrace, lovely flatmates… but it’s barely in Munich. I would have a 45-minute commute to university on the train every day.

Cost? There’s a lovely, spacious flat not far from the city centre… but I can’t afford it.

Flatmates? In the German flat-hunting market, it is crucial to differentiate between a ‘Zweck-WG’ and ‘keine Zweck-WG’. You see, Zweck means ‘function’ or ‘purpose’, while WG stands for Wohngemeinschaft ‘living community’. So we’re talking here about a ‘functional shared flat’, one in which you rent a room – and that’s it. The flatmates are only there to make the rent cheaper. This is not what I am looking for. I want people with whom I can actually live together.

I am invited to a centrally located flat at an unbeatably low price – but it’s clear the flatmates have better places to be and better people to be with. No, I am not prepared to compromise on this.

Flat number five after two weeks of searching. They offer me tea and we sit in the kitchen and it’s not like an interview at all. Berenike is studying to become a teacher and Florian is a product designer and this is clearly keine Zweck-WG. It’s only 25 minutes to university with the U-Bahn, and it’s affordable. Klein aber fein.

‘We’ll let you know by the end of the week,’ Berenike says as I leave. ‘And you let us know if you’d like to live here!’

Twenty-four hours later, we text each other at the same time with the same decision.

I’ve found a flat!

*

I moved in on 14th October – the first day of term at university. After a month of taking it easy in Munich, it all happens at once! Unfortunately, the room was unfurnished apart from a mattress, a table and a clothes stand. Three weeks later, at least I have some clothes hanging up… (I went to Ikea and came away completely overwhelmed. How do people enjoy the experience?! Even the Swedish meatballs didn’t live up to their reputation!).

‘Materialistic’ is certainly not a word I would use to describe myself. I prefer people to things! I guess it’s not surprising where my priorities lay when choosing where to live…

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